pain

this is quotes from Jason Vallotton.... epic and so reassuring to me.

I find myself facing a world that never was, and never will be, what I thought.

Love without a standard is not love at all. It is brokenness finding a home! As I traverse down love’s path again, I am reminded of this truth. I am the only one who has the power to decide what type of relationships I will be involved in. I control my standard. Love is not love unless it costs me something. Love is not love unless it seeks only the highest good. Love is not love unless it leads to freedom. It is false to believe that somehow you can live in this world and never be affected by your decisions and the decisions of others.

Pain is the blackest black, the numbest numb, the deepest deep; pain is feeling so much you cannot comprehend it, to the point that you believe you are not feeling anything at all. Pain temptingly beckons avoidance, denial, and fear. It can cause a person to never consider a bold move again. To be this strong as to cause complete avoidance (of not only pain, but also things such as love, people, communication, etc.) is to be beyond definition.

Loss of trust, unintentional fear, and hopelessness are the obstacles of pain. Waiting for the quick fix, the vaccine is nothing short of being stagnant. Pain means feeling the worst you possibly can but then choosing to believe that there must be a complete opposite to the darkness.

The process of healing can only begin when we stop and stand our ground; when we face the terror of memories that have put us to flight. There is a mindset shift that must take place in order to walk out the road of wholeness. The memories that used to send me crashing are now welcomed in, each one is carefully pondered and mourned until the sting is gone. This is the practice of stewardship. That’s right, you have to steward every painful thought, looking at each one as a gift brought to make you whole. Once your fear is removed, there is an excitement that comes. The excitement lies in this truth: that every memory is a step towards freedom.

The promise of wholeness can be found in the beautiful book of James 1:2 ‘Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you fall into trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.’ This scripture displays the beauty in the breakdown. God has actually designed for our trials and heartache to bring us to a place where we will lack nothing. This is the stewarding process of working through the pain without avoidance. Each trial stewarded becomes a harvest planted.

We live under unavoidable and promising truths that summon our [hearts] to strength previously unknown to our human mind. As we overcome each battle to work through hurt, mourn the memories, and face our fears, the monster of pain loses its force. And although we may have been stripped of everything we thought we knew or understood, we realize we lack nothing; we are free and we are whole.

What ever you want you first have to sow.

Spend your time preparing your mind for greatness; fill your life with the wisdom of God. Use the wisdom of God to show you where to work towards your future, sowing where the ground is fertile. Plant the seeds of truth that come from a life of diligent seeking and prepare for abundance. You will have more than enough to give and prosperity will follow you like success follows wisdom. - Jason Vallotton